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| Wow, Its been such a long time since I have written on here. I guess its one more thing I can vent on or whatever lol. Im sick and really dont feel good at all. I just wanna be better :(. Well for right now Im just gunna chill and get off here. Nice to know I still can get on here lol | | |
| I want to get all this off my chest but Im exhausted and I just cant stay awake much longer to write how I feel. Im just going to pray very hard.....its been a long day. God help me!
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| My grandfather just past away this afternoon. He is out of pain and in a better place...something that none of us can ever imagine until we get to that point. I dont really have much to say. Im hurting, but I know that God will help. I am rejoicing knowing that he is in a better place without pain or suffering ever again. I can' wait for that day to come for me to see him again. A part of me is already in heaven.....my grandpa baumgartner, my papa, and my loving pops. Each of them were a part of my heart and they are now with the Lord, having a wondeful time rejoicing the Lord's name. I can't wait to join them. I always think of my papa and pops meet, they will start making jokes and just wow Im happy hes out of pain and Im happy that I said goodbye, but Im only human I hurt because I have lost a loved one but God has gained one. Thank you God for always helping me through these things. | | |
| Im sick and tired of past things haunting me. I am so scared for something to come...I don't want any sort of affiliation with that person nor do I want to see them or hear from them or have anything to do with them for the rest of my life. It feels like they will haunt me for the rest of my life...knowing the things I do. I regret not standing up, standing up for whats right....oh what have I done. Its sad even his mom has said something about it....wow how sad, how hurtful, its hard. Will it ever pass...oh God help me. I know that in time I will need to speak and say my mind and I understand that but help me to get through all of this now, its so difficult and it hurts. God help. Also, there is something else that I have been struggling with and you know exactly what that is...I feel so unfair, so confused, and uncertain. Its so odd to me to know that all. Oh goodness, I have been thinking of so much and I have so much to do in so little time and I really have many things I need to straighten out. God you are the only one to help me with all of this, please God I ask for your guidance I ask for you to show me the way. I need you, and I have realized only you. Thank you God I love you. | | |
| What a day, I never knew that things could go so well. Well, lately I have been a little short-tempered to say the least and every little thing has just either annoyed me or just upset me for some odd reason....well things in life are getting tough, but I understand that God always makes everything out for the best. I always need to give thanks to Him in every circumstance! Life is tough at times and things happen. But when we look to the Lord he will always guide us and never forsake us. My step mother and I had a wonderful sinner today, actually it was one of the best conversations I think Ive ever had with her. We just I dont know how to explain it, its as if no matter what had happened in the past we just let it go moved on and talked...whether it was about our daily lives or anything else I just was so anxious to tell her everything that I could. I am proud to have her in my life, before I was hurt to even be in the "family" but now I know my responsibilities and I'm really looking forward to building our relationship, I love when God works all of these thigns out....I feel like we can stand on common ground. Praise God!!! Anyways, many other things have happened and I am so thankful for them, God really is working in my life!! Im really glad to have the friends that I do to help me through all of it!! I love you all and God Bless! | | |
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